How Do You Know Yer A Stalker??

I didn't write these, I jus wanted to share what I found online....

1) If you have ever said, in complete seriousness, "If he doesn't return my calls for another couple of
months, I'm dumping his ass!" ...you might be a stalker.

2) If you've ever stood in someone's back yard, under cover of night, without them knowing, just so
you could stare at them through the back door ... you might be a stalker.

3) If you've ever driven 1200 miles to leave a badly wilted rose, wrapped in a badly tied black ribbon
in someone's mailbox in the middle of the night, then turned around and driven 1200 miles
home... you might be a stalker.

4) If upon returning home, you promptly e-mailed them your travel pictures, thinking they would
find a picture of your half eaten fast food lunch blocks from their house fascinating even though
they weren't speaking to you at that time... you might be a stalker.

5) If you've sent more than 200 e-mails, over a one month period, to someone who refuses to reply...
you might be a stalker.

6) If any percentage of those e-mails say "Fine! I'm not writing to you anymore" but are then
followed up with 10 conversational e-mails... you might be a stalker.

7) If, upon learning that his girlfriend has moved in with him, your reaction is to order a custom
printed welcome mat, with your name and his, and have it mailed to his house... you might be a
stalker.

8) If you have created an e-mail address combining your first name with the last name of someone
who doesn't e-mail, call, or LIKE you... you might be a stalker.

9) If you're not speaking to your family because they've told you they think you're a stalker ...you
might be a stalker.

10) If upon being informed that you're going to be arrested for trespassing if you show up on your
love interest's property, your family says "Well, some jail time might do her good." ... you might be a
stalker.

11) If he says he doesn't want to see you, and you interpret this to mean he does want to see you...
naked... in his e-mail... you might be a stalker.

12) If you posted comments anonymously to his girlfriend's blog, posing as a concerned reader and
friend, but encouraging her to dump him... you might be a stalker.

13) If you've spent so much time on his webpage, on his blog, writing him e-mails, and searching for
his name on the internet that you've been fired from your job... you might be a stalker.

14) If you have ever sent a sex help book (with tabs to highlight your favorite parts) or pictures of
yourself in lingere' to someone who has repeatedly clearly stated that they will not be having sex
with you... you might be a stalker.

15) If you have ever mailed home decorating items, or purchased something like... say a piano, for a
house that you are not welcome to ever set foot in... you might be a stalker.

16) If you have subscribed to magazines and had them sent to the house of someone who hasn't
spoken to you in over a year, using their last name... you might be a stalker.

17) If you've encouraged your equally mentally unstable friends to troll the blog of, and sent hateful
e-mails to, the fiancee' of your love interest... you might be a stalker.

18) If you've called someone every four hours, whether he answers or not, for a week... you might be
a stalker.

19) If, when he does answer the phone it's only to tell you to quit calling, and to please leave him
alone... you might be a stalker.

20) If you've shown up at the airport with your mother and a wedding dress, expecting to be picked
up by and married to someone who hasn't answered your calls, letters or e-mails in over a year...
you might be a stalker.

21) If your friends TELL you you're a stalker, and secretly send e-mails to the object of your
affection explaining to him how sick you are and encouraging him to break off all contact with you
"for your own good"... you might be a stalker.

22) If you've anonymously sent (bad) poetry, a poem every week, to someone you know isn't
interested in you, and don't realize that there's a zip code on the postmark, making the appearance
of anonymous poetry not quite the mystery you'd hoped for... you might be a stalker.

23) If you're reading this list thinking "This isn't funny!!"... you might be a stalker.

24) If you're reading this list thinking "Oh Wow!!! These are some great romantic ideas!!!" ... you
might be a stalker.

25) If you're reading this thinking "Oh my God, she's talking about ME!!!", you ARE a stalker, and
stay the hell out of my back yard!!!!

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... To be continued.